A MOTLEY MELANGE OF MONDEGREENS

Mondegreens: Misheard, misunderstood song lyrics, quotes, sayings, etc.

“Deck the halls with bells of jolly.”
(Actual lyric: “Deck the halls with boughs of holly.”)
-- Anonymous

“Strike the harp, enjoy the florist.”
(Actual lyric: “Strike the harp and join the chorus.”)
-- Anonymous

“Strike the heart, and join the chorus.”
(Actual lyric: “Strike the harp and join the chorus.”)
-- Anonymous

“Don we now our day of peril.”
(Actual lyric: “Don we now our gay apparel.”)
-- Anonymous

“Jolly Old St. Nicholas,/Clean your ear this way.”
(Actual lyric: “Jolly Old St. Nicholas,/Lean your ear this way.”)
-- Bob Dvorak

“Police car ahead.”
(Actual lyric: “Feliz Navidad.”)
-- Anonymous

“Police got my dad.”
(Actual lyric: “Feliz Navidad.”)
-- Anonymous

“Fleas on your butt”
(Actual lyric: “Feliz Navidad.”)
-- Marian Allen

“There’s fleas on your dad.”
(Actual lyric: “Feliz Navidad.”)
-- Anonymous

“The first Noel,/The angels did say,/Was to frighten poor shepherds/In fields as they lay.”
(Actual lyric: “The first Noel,/The angels did say,/Was to certain poor shepherds/In fields as they lay.”)
-- Anonymous

“Barney’s the King of Israel.”
(Actual lyric: “Born is the King of Israel.”)
-- Anonymous

“Frosty the Snowman/Is a ferret elf they say.”
(Actual lyric: “Frosty the Snowman/Is a fairy tale they say.”)
-- Anonymous

“With a corncob pipe and a bloody nose.”
(Actual lyric: “With a corncob pipe and a button nose.”)
-- Anonymous

“Get dressed, ye married gentlemen.”
(Actually lyric: “God rest ye merry, gentlemen.”)
-- Anonymous

“Good King Wences’ car backed out/On the feet of heathens.”
(Actual lyric: “Good King Wenceslas looked out/On the feast of Stephen.”)
-- Anonymous

“Good King Wences’ car backed out/On a piece of Stephen.”
(Actual lyric: “Good King Wenceslas looked out/On the feast of Stephen.”)
Richard Lederer

“Good king wants his applesauce/At the feast this evening.”
(Actual lyric: “Good King Wenceslas looked out/On the feast of Stephen.”
-- Anonymous