A MOTLEY MELANGE OF MONDEGREENS

Mondegreens: Misheard, misunderstood song lyrics, quotations, sayings, and the like

Born free, as free as the willows.”
(Actual lyric: “Born free, as free as the wind blows.”)
-- Eric Storm

“What a friend we have in cheeses.”
(Actual lyric: “What a friend we have in Jesus.”)
-- Richard Lederer

“Round yon virgin mother and child/Holy infantry, tender and mild....”
(Actual lyric: “Round yon virgin mother and child/Holy infant so tender and mild….”)
-- Unnamed source quoted in Stan Kegel’s ezine, Puns of the Day

“Roundy - on virgin.”
(Actual lyric: “Round yon virgin.”)
Neil Woodward

“Holy Vincent, so tender and mild.”
(Actual lyric: Holy infant, so tender and mild.”)
-- Richard Lederer

“I’ll be home for Christmas,/But homely in my dreams.”
(Actual lyric: “I’ll be home for Christmas,/But only in my dreams.”)
-- Bob Dvorak

“They wouldn’t let poor Rudolph join in ninny reindeer games.”
(Actual lyric: “They wouldn’t let poor Rudolph join in any reindeer games.”)
-- Gary Hallock

“Then one smoggy piss mess eve...”
(Actual lyric: “Then one foggy Chirstmas eve.”)
-- Dawn

“You’ll go down in Listerine.”
(Actual lyric: “You’ll go down in history.”)
-- Richard Lederer

“Displayed my breast for him...pa’s-rump a pom pom.”
(Actual lyric: “I played my best for him. Pa-rum-pum-pum-pum.”)
-- Gary Hallock

“Deck the halls with Buddy Holly.”
(Actual lyric: “Deck the halls with boughs of holly.”)
-- Anonymous

“Deck the halls with Bowson’s Harley.”
(Actual lyric: “Deck the halls with boughs of holly.”)
-- Anonymous