JEST FOR FUN

What's the difference between a dry cleaner and a lawyer: The cleaner pays you if he loses your suit. If a lawyer loses your suit, he will still take you to the cleaners.

JEST FOR FUN

A Saudi Prince went to Germany to study. A month later, he sends a letter to his dad saying, "Berlin is wonderful, people are nice and I really like it here, but I'm a bit ashamed to arrive to school with my gold Mercedes when all my teachers travel by train." Sometime later, he gets a letter from his dad with a ten million dollar check saying, "Stop embarrassing us, go and get yourself a train too! ”

JEST FOR FUN

A woman was teaching her 6-year-old daughter how to unbuckle her seat belt. The girl asked, "Do I click the square?"
The mother said, "Yes."
She then asked, "Single click or double click?"

JEST FOR FUN

After many years, a young Jewish Talmud student who had left the old country for America returns to visit the family. "But--where is your beard?" asks his mother upon seeing him. "Mama," he replies, "in America, nobody wears a beard." "But at least you keep the Sabbath?" "Mama, business is business. In America, everybody works on the Sabbath." "But kosher food you still eat?" "Mama, in America, it is very difficult to keep kosher." The old lady ponders this information and then leans over and whispers in his ear, "Isaac, tell me--you’re still circumcised?"

JEST FOR FUN

In a doctor's waiting room, a nurse was explaining to a group of women how their infants were weighed. "First of all, we weigh the mother on her own. Then we weigh the mother while she holds her baby. Then we subtract the mother's weight from the combined weight of mother and baby, and we then have the baby's weight." At which point one of the women said: "Sorry, nurse, but that won't work for me." "Why not?" asked the nurse. The woman replied, "I'm the baby's aunt."

JEST FOR FUN

When asked by a young patrol officer " Do you know you were speeding "? This 83-year-old woman talked herself out of a ticket by stating, "Yes, but, I had to get there before I forgot where I was going". "Makes perfectly good sense to me," said the officer and let her go with a warning.

JEST FOR FUN

Coming home from his Little League game, Billy swung open the front door very excited. His father, unable to attend the game, immediately inquired as to what happened. "So, how did you do son?" he asked. "You'll never believe it!" Billy said. "I was responsible for the winning run!" "Really? That's great!" the father said, proudly. "So you batted one out of the park and brought everyone home?" "No," the boy answered. "It's when I was playing in the outfield." "I don't understand," the father said. "How could you be responsible for the winning run if you were the outfielder?" The boy replied, "I dropped the ball!"